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My Mother, My Hero.

While going through my saved ‘Drafts’ today, I found this blog I had written the night my mom had a massive heart attack a few years ago. Re-reading it, brought that horrible day back to life for me, but every word I wrote stands true to this day.. I never shared it before, so here goes nothing!

“As I sit here in this cold and dreary hospital room, my mind wandering in countless directions, I can’t help but thank God that this uncomfortable chair is my bed tonight. The ceiling light is barely grazing your face and for the first time in the last 12 hours, you look peaceful and satisfied. If I didn’t know it, I wouldn’t think that you just survived a heart attack. 

Today was the scariest day of my life. When I got the message that something was wrong with you, my world stopped. The only thing I could think about was getting to you. I had no idea what to expect when I walked in to the emergency room, but with all the nurses and doctors crowded around your bedside, I feared that something was seriously wrong.

You won’t remember this because of all the medications they gave you, but we prayed together. Just you, me, and the Chaplain. I held your hand, as you held his and we asked God to be with you. When the prayer was over, you looked at me and cried out, “I’m so scared.” I kissed your head and told you I loved you. I promised that everything would be okay. I remember standing there, feeling helpless as I watched them take you away. I could feel my eyes swelling with tears, but I fought to hold them back until you were out of sight. I couldn’t let you see me break down, I needed to be strong for you. I wanted so badly for someone to wake me up from this horrible nightmare and eventually you did. It felt like an eternity before it was over, but when the doctor came out and told us that you had suffered a massive heart attack, but that the surgery successful and you were now stable, it was like nothing else in the world mattered.

Your strength is so inspiring. Your courage is relentless. You are the most brave person I know and that is why you are my hero. Growing up people always used to say, “your mother is (or will become) your best friend”. I’d just roll my eyes and laugh. I couldn’t imagine that the person that took my cell phone away or grounded me for weeks would ever become my ‘friend’, but they were right.

I couldn’t imagine my life without you. God only knows where I’d be today if I didn’t have you by my side throughout the years. For as long as I can remember, it’s always been you and I against the world. No matter what obstacles life has thrown our way, you’ve always had my back and I’ve had yours. We may fight like cats and dogs at times and occasionally party like sisters, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Thank you for being the fighter you are and inspiring me in more ways than one. From beating cancer to surviving a massive heart attack, this was just another bump in the road for you. Once again, you have shown your resilience. You are my rock and I am forever thankful that you are a warrior. I love you most, Mom.”

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Throw In The Towel Kind of Day.

Here’s to you, mama:

It’s one of those days.. When it’s 7:30 am and the day has already gone awry and you really just want to bury your face in a pillow and ‘scream it out’. It’s that day when nothing sounds better than curling up on the couch with your favorite snack, binge watching the latest hit Netflix series, but there’s just too much to do. When it’s not even noon and you’re already wishing that it was tomorrow; when you doubt your capabilities to survive the day because your kid(s) is fussing and you’re totally behind and you’re really just out of breath.

You are not alone.

I know all about the messes, the laundry that’s been left in the dryer since yesterday, the animal cracker crumbs that have found their home on your freshly swept kitchen floor. I’ve been there- when it’s leftover pizza for breakfast and toys trailing from one room to the next, when the grass needs cut and the dishes are starting to pile up in the sink. I get it, you just want to shower (in peace) and be on time for once. We all have those days, when our patience has run thin and there’s not enough caffeine in the city to give you the energy you need.

You do the same things, day in and day out and yet, you still feel behind, like you’re racing to try to catch up to this undefined bar of normal. Remember life before kids? When there was only you (and maybe your hubby and the dog) to take care of. You could clean once every other day and the house would stay that way? You get on Facebook and see the neighborhood Martha Stewart is at it again with her ‘picture perfect’ family having craft time- there’s no glitter on the floor or glue in her daughter’s hair.. If only. It’s hard not to compare; not to question why your baby won’t pose like that for pictures or how her house always stays so organized. Don’t we all want that? Well, I’m here to tell you, before my son, that’s how I envisioned motherhood would be for myself. What a joke, right? Because that is so not my reality. Somedays, although they are far and few between, occasionally, it works out that way- I feel like I’ve got it all figured out and I’m on top of the world. But don’t be fooled by social media, because most of the time, it is hectic and it is hard.

When you’ve lost all hope and you feel like throwing in the towel, just breathe mama. They won’t be little for long. There will come a day when the toys covering the floor will be thrown in a box, covered in dust. Before you know it, the countertops will stay clean and the laundry will lessen. The halls will be quiet and you’ll be back on a regular sleep schedule. On those really hard days, remember that in the midst of it all, sometimes it’s okay to not be okay.

Remind yourself of all that you do accomplish each and every day.

A lot of times, what we get finished is clouded by the chaos. We tend to focus more on the unchecked boxes of our to-do lists, instead of patting ourselves on the back for the good deeds done. As mother’s- and wives, we feel responsible, so it’s easy to get caught up in the fears of failing, but don’t let it consume you. Allow yourself that five minute mental break or your favorite glass of wine, then put your ‘big girl’ pants on, pull yourself together and do it all over again.

Don’t dwell on those ‘throw in the towel’ kind of days, there might just come a time when you miss them (a little). Motherhood is a challenge, but it is so rewarding and we are all in this thing together.

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This Is Not Where My Story Ends: Giving Up Is Not An Option.

Life has a crazy way of kicking us when we’re down, doesn’t it? We’ve all heard the saying, “When it rains, it pours..” and I’m sure most of us have probably even used it a few times ourselves. Sometimes life can be so overwhelming, so exhausting, but that’s just all part of the journey. Nobody ever said that it was going to be easy. 

When I was young, just a pre-teen, babysitting my brothers and neighborhood kids, I dreamed of the days that I would grow up and become a mother, taking care of my own children. As I rocked my youngest brother to sleep, I’d fantasize about what my house would look like and how my life would be in the years to come. I imagined myself and my husband like most other girls my age did, everything fell perfectly into place and I got my happily ever after ending. I always joked that I wanted three kids and two dogs. I had it all planned out. It was picture perfect and over the years, I kept faith that my hopes would someday become my reality.

I’d like to think that I’m blessed with my relationship, I found a man that exceeded all my expectations and we make a great team. It’s a safe bet to say that we appear to be just like any other couple our age, from the outside looking in. Strangers would probably never guess what we’ve been through in the six, almost seven, years that we’ve been together. Overall, we’ve created a great life for ourselves, but my dream of my picture perfect family hasn’t quite come together just yet though. It’s not because we haven’t been close, because damn it, we’ve been so close more times than I’d like to admit, but unfortunately, we have yet to successfully welcome a child into this world that we can hold in our arms forever. In fact, this part of the plan has been nothing short of complicated, but this is not where our story ends.

I’ve had countless people ask me if we were going to be trying again and then proceed to ask me how I could ever “want to put myself through that again”. I’ve been repeatedly asked how I’m not “afraid” of possibly losing another baby and I’ve even had people say, “there’s always adoption!” as they continue to to tell me how crazy and selfish I would be, if I were to get pregnant again. I’ve literally heard it all. 

Let me start by saying, thanks for your input and excuse my language, but fuck off. If you’ve never gotten a positive pregnancy test, only to be told that there is no heartbeat; if you’ve never had baby showers or gender reveals only to be left with unopened and unused presents; if you’ve never felt a baby kick from the inside, only to hold it’s still and silent body in your arms just a couple weeks later; if you’ve never been through the loss of a child, then you have no idea what I need to do or how I should proceed with the decisions I make in my life and you will never understand the internal battle that I have with myself every single day.

Every time I’ve gotten a positive pregnancy test, my longing to have a living child has grown that much more. My motherly instincts kick in and I instantly become overwhelmed with emotions. I fight to not get my hopes up, but it’s close to impossible not to. I cry in fear of what may happen and I pray to God for guidance and a healthy baby. Every single time, it’s an emotional rollercoaster. 

To answer your question, hell yes I am terrified of losing another baby. I spend more time than not worrying about all the things that could go wrong, but to me, every single aspect of it, is more than worth it, if it means I’ll get my rainbow baby someday. I don’t regret a single pregnancy, because I felt a happiness and an unconditional love for each baby, that I never even knew existed. I don’t have anything ‘wrong’ with me nor have I been diagnosed with something that would prevent me from ever having a healthy child, so I will continue to take the chance and try for my forever baby. If that makes me crazy and selfish, then so be it.

Pregnancy is not always easy and I don’t just mean the awful morning sickness or the backaches that come along with it. You see, getting pregnant isn’t just an ‘oops!’ for everyone. It takes some couples thousands of dollars in treatments and medications before they are finally blessed with a child. For others, staying pregnant is one of the biggest challenges that they may ever face and sometimes, there just isn’t an explanation as to why. So before you question or judge someone else, try to put yourself in their place, it may not make sense to you, but it doesn’t have to. Giving up is just not an option, staying strong is the only choice I’ve got. 

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The Life of A ‘Loss Mother’..

​1 in 4. It’s that common. Did you know that more than 500,000 pregnancies each year end in miscarriage? Over 23,600 babies are born sleeping a year in just the United States alone. So many parents are affected by the loss of a child and some families have even suffered from multiple losses. These statistics may seem minuscule in the big scheme of things, because every time you scroll through Facebook or refresh your Instagram feed, it seems like yet another person has announced that they’re expecting, but roughly 19% of the adult population has experienced the loss of a child. Regardless of what stage of pregnancy the loss occurred or how much time the parents were given with their child before they had to say goodbye, there are no words to fully describe the pain that is felt throughout life after that loss. There is said to be 7 billion people in this world and roughly, 1.33 billion are parents who have to go through life without their child (or children). So tell me, why is it not talked about? Why do so many parents feel so alone and hide their stories amongst themselves, when there are over one billion other people in the world who have been in similar situations and are familiar with the grief that takes over, when a child is taken far too soon? 

I am a loss mother. To my fellow loss parents, I know the heartache and the pain all too well and I am here to tell you that you are not alone. I have held back and kept quiet. I have shut myself out from the world. I have been bitter and I have pushed those that are closest to me away, because I didn’t know what else to do. There is no ‘right’ way to grieve. Death affects us all differently and it’s only natural that we find our own ways to cope with it. However, from my personal experience, I learned that not talking about it did not help. Not sharing my story, my life, didn’t change the fact that my heart is forever hurting. I was suffering alone, but that didn’t make my situation any less real. Regardless of if I held it all in and cried myself to sleep for months without ever telling a single soul or if I post novels on Facebook sharing my every emotion, I am still a loss mother and nothing is going to change that.

No two stories are the same; we may have faced different challenges, but we have one thing in common, the longing for our child(children) to be in our arms. The struggles we face as loss parents, never go away. For days, months, and years to follow, we are haunted by the fact that this is our harsh reality. If you are a loss parent or you know or love someone that is, try to remember the following things, when you see that they are having a rough day: (Trust me, they happen and sometimes the grief will hit like a ton of bricks.)

You don’t have to know what to say.

We don’t expect you to, because honestly, there is nothing that anyone can say to ease the pain. Sometimes we just need to know that someone is there to listen and to hold us while we cry.

Don’t be afraid to ask.

Chances are we are waiting for the opportunity to talk about our children. Talking about them keeps their spirit and memory alive and that’s all we have left, so ask us about them. I bet you’ll see the light in our eyes when we start describing the most intimate moments and reminiscing about the sweet little angels they are.

It takes time.

Everyone is different and we all grieve differently. Time does not heal all wounds, because some were just not meant to be healed. The hole in a loss parent’s heart is forever.  I know the emotional rollercoaster ride may seem never ending at times, but we will get there, when we get there and that’s okay.

Blame. It’s going to happen.

As a loss parent, it is impossible not to feel at fault. “What did I do wrong?” “What could I have done differently?” “How could I let this happen?” “I was supposed to protect my child and I failed.” It’s hard, so, so hard, but it is no one’s fault. We don’t always understand the plan that’s in place for us, but we’re not supposed to. Sometimes there is just no justification for when, where, how or why things happen.

Patience is a virtue.

There will be days when it takes everything we have just to get out of bed and change into semi-presentable clothes. There will also be those days where there are more tears than there are words spoken. There will be sleepless nights and a loss of appetite, but be patient. Figuring out how to put the pieces back together isn’t an easy task, but having support to stick it out through the dark days, makes it seem less impossible.

Tomorrow is another day.

Some days smiling comes easy. Our hearts are full of hope and faith. The memories we have bring joy and we are overcome with happiness because of the unconditional love the we felt from our little ones. Signs of our angels will appear in the craziest ways, letting each of us know when our babies are near. Those are the good days. They may be few and far between, but when they happen, it’s a reminder that we are going to be okay, that we are going to make it.

The journey of life after loss is just that, a journey. Every day is a challenge, but it is another day closer to being with our children again. Pregnancy, infant, and child loss are so common all over the world and the more we open up about it, the more we can come together. Losing a child doesn’t make someone any less of a parent; they just become an extra special kind, because their child is an angel. Share your story or be a listening ear. Let’s break the silence.

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I Found My Faith In You.

The news channels are constantly filled with tragedies and sadness these days, from murders and robberies to different disasters occurring all over the world; yet, in the midst of all the chaos and madness going on, I have found my piece of faith in you little one.

You see, right now you’re still growing and you’re still developing. You are completely unaware of what’s happening all around us. Your innocent eyes have yet to witness pain and your pure heart knows nothing but the love that your daddy and I express to you daily. To you, crime and evil don’t yet exist and I wish more than anything, I could keep it this way forever.

You know, I have a huge job lying ahead of me, as your mommy.. There are so many things I’ve jotted down in journals and lists I’ve made in random notebooks, in order to try to remember everything that I want to teach you. But as I sit here, thinking about all that is going on in the world, something became very clear to me..

All the lists, the notes, the ideas that I’ve come up with, in hopes to help you grow into an amazing man, are nothing compared to what I need to show you about cherishing each and every moment of your life. Sure, you’ll need to know your ABC’s and how to count to 100. Your daddy will teach everything important about how to throw the perfect spiral and hitting a line drive that not even Brandon Phillips can catch, but at the end of the day, on top teaching you all the necessary hacks to life, I hope I can show you how to love..

​You’re going to be told the same thing for the rest of your life, that “time goes faster than you think,” but trust me, it really does. So love hard and love passionately while you can, because things won’t always be the same. Your friends will probably change like the seasons, but you’ll meet the select few that will stick by your side through thick and thin. Your favorite sport will change as you realize which one you’re better at or maybe you won’t even like sports at all. Everything that seems to make sense one day, will make you feel scatter-brained the next, but that’s okay.

Hold on to each moment that you’re given, even the struggles, because although it may seem like your world is crashing down at the time, when you look back, you’ll see how every obstacle you faced had a part in shaping you into the perfect gentleman that I know you’re going to be. Spend your life doing whatever it is that makes you happy. Make memories with anyone. No, actually make memories with everyone, because there will come a time when memories are all that are left. I know I’ve told you a lot of things, most that you won’t understand for a little while longer, but I have one more request of you..

Always remember that you are my entire life and that is the one thing that will never change. When things get tough and when you want to give up, don’t. I can’t promise you that this life will always be easy but I can promise you that we will face it together, because you will always be my baby.

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To The Girl Who Lost Herself In The Midst of The Chaos.

Listen, I get it. I totally do. We’ve all been there before. You didn’t ask to fall for him, it just kind of happened. But when the honeymoon stage has faded and the ‘fairytale’ has ended and you finally see his true worth, no excuse that you give me is enough for me to think that you should stay in this toxic relationship and here’s why..

“I don’t want to be alone.”
Since when did being ‘single’ become being alone? You’re only alone if you sit in the house and mope around thinking about and missing him. You have friends and family that love you and chances are they miss you, a lot, especially since most of your time has been spent with him recently anyway. Go out and have fun. Be the twenty-something year old you are and enjoy it while you can.

“I’m comfortable.”
Change is not always a bad thing. If you think about it, change is all around us and year after year things change, it’s a part of life. Just because you’re used to not being happy, doesn’t mean that it’s right. Plus, getting rid of him will be a good kind of change. You’ll no longer have to worry about pleasing anyone but yourself and we all deserve to be a little selfish sometimes.

“I’ve already put in too much time and effort.”
EXACTLY. This is a prime example of why you need to run away while you can. When it’s true love and it’s real, it won’t take months (or years) to make it work. It will just happen. Why spend even more of your time putting forth effort with a boy that isn’t doing the same for you? A relationship should always be 100/100. If you’re not getting what you give, it’s time to move on.

“He will change.”
Oh really? I mean, I guess I could totally believe this if I hadn’t already heard it a million times before. You cannot force him to change. A person will only change when they are ready and they see it fit. If he doesn’t want to change- and obviously he doesn’t given the last 20 chances you’ve given him- you can kiss that thought goodbye, because it’s not going to happen.

“I love him.”
Ever heard the saying, if you love someone let them go? It’s pretty accurate if you ask me. Loving someone, loving the idea of someone, is not the same as being in love with someone. When you are in love, you are fully committed to that person. You will find the good in their flaws and you will love them even on their bad days. Does he do this for you? I doubt it, because if he did, people would be able to see it from the outside and you wouldn’t feel the need to justify why you’re dating him.

“I don’t want to hurt him.”
If you’re still with him after all that you’ve been through, that just shows how big of a heart you have. Not many girls would stick around the way you have and that’s because you care about others so much, but he is not your problem. It is not your job to ‘help’ him. You are not his mother. He didn’t care to hurt you, did he? If you’re not happy, then staying isn’t fair. Sure there are times that you’ve been happy over the course of your relationship, but you deserve to be happy every single day.

I know it’s hard to believe, but at the end of all of this, you will be okay and you will be stronger than you’ve ever been before, but you need to let go. You’re never going find the man that will treat you the way you deserve to be treated if you continue holding on to the boy who doesn’t appreciate you. It will be difficult at first but it will get easier. I promise. One day, you will wake up and look in the mirror and you will be proud of the courage you’ve gained by simply walking away. You will learn to love yourself again.

So let goMove on. Find the girl you lost in the midst of all this chaos. She’s still there and she will be even better than ever before if you let her.

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A Letter To My Unborn Child.

Dear Little One, 

    We have yet to look into each other’s eyes and I have yet to hold you in my arms, but it’s crazy because somehow, I feel as if I already know exactly who you are. It’s only been a handful of weeks since you became a reality, but in that short amount of time, you have changed my entire world. We haven’t officially been introduced yet, but over the next several months, we will continue ‘growing’ together, as will the bond that we have already formed, and before long, you’ll know exactly who I am, you’re mommy.

    Saying those words makes my heart fill with so much joy and excitement. I cannot wait to feel your kicks and movements as you are developing in my tummy. I cannot wait to start shopping and spoiling you to ensure that we are fully prepared (but no worries, because that won’t stop once you’re actually here). I know the days will get longer and the nights of sleeping that I enjoy so much will soon become a thing of the past, as you take a toll on my body, but I am beyond ready for this journey with you. I promise, I won’t complain too much when the backaches kick in or when the restroom becomes my new favorite place because you like to use my bladder as a pillow. As odd as it sounds, I’m ecstatic for those moments; the challenges, the hardships, the pain, all of it.. because the end result is you and I know you will be worth it.     

    It won’t be long before I get to see your sweet face and smother you with kisses, but until then, I will continue talking to you from out here and doing my very best to keep you safe in there. I try to imagine who you will look like. My nose and daddy’s eyes or maybe daddy’s lips and my chubby cheeks? But regardless, I know that you are going to be the most beautiful baby and your daddy and I are so very blessed.

    I look forward to all of the ‘firsts’ that I will share with you and the many more that will follow after. I am counting down the days until I get to hold you for the very first time. But for now, I find myself reading up on your progress daily to see what new things you can do and how your little body is forming into my very own dream come true. Every day for the rest of my life, I will have you to look forward to.

     I pray for you each and every day, just as I prayed for you long before I knew you existed. I pray that you continue to grow and be healthy and strong so that when you’re ready to finally make your grand entrance, it’s absolutely perfect- just like I know that it will be.

    It’s amazing how many people already love you and ask about you often. Can you imagine how they will be once you arrive? You have so much love surrounding you already, but you just have to promise that mommy and daddy will always be your favorites!

    Little one, you’ve already completely stolen my heart and I will cherish every second that I spend carrying you, not only in my belly, but also in my arms. I am beyond thankful that I have been blessed with you. Life is full of adventures, but this is by far my favorite one.

Love always,

Your mommy.

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The Life of A ‘Basic’ Girl’s Boyfriend.

​Ladies, we all know how we are, although some are more willing to admit than others.. We can be overly sensitive, a bit melodramatic at times, occasionally emotional, and sometimes feisty, but let’s be real, what’s not to love about that perfect mess?

​It’s hard for us to accept the fact that most guys just don’t understand us and probably never will. Sure we can burst out into tears when our eyeliner just won’t ‘wing’ right or when we have to decide if being late to work is worth the long line at Starbucks (because a Venti Iced Espresso Vanilla Latte is literally life) but that’s just normal issues that everyone has at some point, right? Eh, wrong, at least for a man, that is.

​As you can see, the life of a basic girl’s boyfriend can be somewhat exhausting with trying to keep up with our ever-changing emotions. So guys, here are some pointers to prepare you before you take the plunge and finally make it ‘Facebook official’ with what seems to be your dream girl..

Food is not just for eating.

Don’t even think about touching your plate before it’s positioned just right for the perfect picture to upload on Instagram and don’t be offended when the conversations are paused for at least five minutes after the picture is taken as she makes one of the most difficult decisions of her day, which filter to use.

Buy an extra TV.

Trust me, this will not be a waste of money. Whether it’s Orange Is the New Black or Pretty Little Liars, The Bachelor or a classic Lifetime movie, she will want to control the television. Unless she’s one of the lucky ones that finds a man who will enjoy these shows with her, I guarantee you’re going to want your own TV at some point, either to play Xbox or watch College football.. I promise, you’re going to thank me later.

Get used to the camera.

Along with your fancy plates, your face will be allover Instagram too. Prepare yourself for millions of selfies in one day, wearing the same outfit, until she finds the perfect angle. Before long you’ll be used to it and you will no longer mind the fact that you have become the designated picture taker because you’re arms are longer so selfie’s are just easier for you.

You will listen to Justin Bieber and Taylor Swift.

You can deny it all you want and you can try to fight it, but believe me, you will. You’ll end up knowing the words just as well as she does. You’ll find the songs stuck in your head even when she’s not around. It’s worth it for her though, because she’ll really appreciate your jam sessions together.

Diamonds? Sure, but make-up? Always.

You will never believe the amount of time she has spent on Youtube watching videos trying to conquer the perfect contour and highlight to make her face look like Beyonce when she wakes up, flawless. You’ll never guess how much money it cost for her to get the perfect color locks. Compliment her. She will notice when you don’t.

Time management is not a thing.

5 minutes means at least another hour and rushing her will only slow her down, because then she’ll get stressed and you know how emotional she is when she gets stressed out.. so, just make yourself comfortable. If the two of you need to be somewhere at a certain time, tell her it’s an hour before when you actually need to be there and you might just make it when you’re supposed to.

Her friends will know everything.

If you mess up, be prepared for her friends to know all about it. If you hurt her, you hurt them all. You think one girlfriend is rough, try one girlfriend and her three best friends, you will never win that war. So remember what you got yourself into and don’t be an, excuse my language, asshole.

Snapchat is her diary.

You can pretty much figure out anything you need to know about her day by checking out her Snapchat story. She loves to document when her favorite song comes on the radio while she’s driving and she is obsessed with all the different filters. If you have any questions or she’s not answering your calls, check her story, I bet you’ll get all the answers you were looking for.

​Having a ‘basic’ girlfriend really isn’t all that hard and you will get the hang of it eventually. We’re easy to please for the most part, if you can see past our expensive habits and accept us for the princesses we are, lol, you’ll be just fine. So, remember these few tips and others that you’ll learn as you go and you will be in there like swimwear. You might as well skip the dating scene and put a ring on it, you’re a keeper

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Here’s Why You Should Date A Girl That Loves Football..

It’s that time of the year again.. We are officially days away from the first game of the 2017 NFL season and College football is now in full swing. Everyone’s got their fantasy teams ready to go and are counting down for game time. Some would say, scratch that, most would say, that it’s the best time of the year and I could not agree more. Guys, having a girlfriend may seem difficult during football season because let’s be real, some girls will just never understand the game and they definitely don’t get why you love it so much, but hear me out, some of us are actually dying for the season to start just as much as you are and I must say, when she’s not only a total babe but she loves football too, that is a huge plus. Here’s just a few reasons why dating a girl that loves football may just be the best decision of your life..

She’ll keep the fridge stocked with cold ones.

She knows the deal, ‘there will be no beer runs to the store while football is on.’ She knows that you’re gonna need a celebratory beer every time your team scores, but she understands that you will also need a beer if your team starts losing, so she makes sure that there is always enough and chances are, she’ll be right there shotgunning one with you.

She’ll never get annoyed when you check your phone for scores.

She understands that keeping up with your team is important, that includes the players on your fantasy team as well, so she’ll never nag you when you continuously check your phone for updates. She’ll probably be on hers too, keeping herself up to date with the latest football news.

She knows what the weekends are for.

Whether you have tickets to go to the game or are just watching it at home, she knows better than to make special plans with you during game time and she will never ask you to change the channel because she knows the importance of it. There will be no distractions. If anything, she’ll be right there cheering with you. 

She will make you the best snacks.

Wings, Buffalo Dip, Pizza, you name it.. She’ll make sure you and the guys have all the best snacks available, but understand that you need to save some for her too, because she’ll join you in stuffing her face with no hesitation. Football Sundays just aren’t the same without all the good food.

She knows the rules.

You won’t have to worry about her embarrassing you when it comes to football talk, she knows the rules and understands the game. She’ll throw out information you didn’t even know and will start calling out penalties before the refs even say it. She is not afraid to yell at the TV for stupid calls. Trust me, you’ll be impressed with what she knows and it’ll only make you like her even more.

She gets your mood swings.

She knows that if your team loses, it’s like you’ve lost too, so she accepts your little attitude with no questions asked. But you also need understand that she may be the same exact way, if not worse, when her team lets her down, so there should be no judgements from you when she gets emotional too.

She enjoys SportsCenter.

Yes, you read that right. She won’t fuss when the TV is on SportsCenter because she likes catching all of the game updates too. You can only see so much flipping back and forth between games during commercials, so she’ll be totally okay with watching the highlights with you.

She’ll go to the game, regardless of the weather.

When she’s a true football fan, she’ll love going to any game whether it’s -10 degrees or pouring rain. She’ll stock you up with hand warmers and you’ll never be without a poncho. Not to mention, she’ll make sure that you have plenty of your teams hats, hoodies, and jackets to wear throughout the season. She will be there right along with you rooting them on and she won’t mind getting to the stadium to start tailgating extra early.

She understands shit talking.

Every team has their rival. She knows what teams to hate and what teams to cheer for. Don’t be surprised when she starts the shit talking if she sees someone wearing the wrong teams jersey. She knows that’s just part of the game and will enjoy it just as much as you do.

If she likes the same team as you, the two of you will be the ultimate duo, like Tom Brady to Gronk. You’ll never argue over who’s team is better. If she likes a different team, you will probably end up in serious debates with lots of football conversation, but there’s nothing better than that right? Basically, dating a girl that loves football just as much as you do is a total win and regardless you can’t go wrong. 

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There’s A Person Out There Somewhere Looking For Someone Just Like You.

     I believe that there is someone out there for everyone. Some may find their soulmate at 15 years old, while others are lucky at 40, but regardless of when we find them, I believe that there’s a person out there somewhere looking for someone just like you. We date, or at least most of us do, with the hopes of finding the relationship that has the spark that will never burn out. With each relationship, we open our hearts and pray that ‘this one will be it’, that all the tears and the lonely nights have come to an end, but even when we’ve found the one, how do we know for sure? Do we ever really know or do we just take the chance with the person that seems to fit best in our lives, because we’ve been so desperate to find love for so long? There is a difference between loving and being in love and trust me, when you’ve found your person, you will easily be able to discover it. Here are just a few subtle signs that you’re on your way to forever with ‘the one’..

1. You argue.                                                         Yes, that’s right. You disagree and you argue. I know you’re probably thinking I’m crazy for believing that arguing is actually a good thing, but I promise, arguments are key in a strong relationship. They always say that you can’t appreciate the good times, without experiencing the bad too. So don’t start planning the break up as soon as things get tough, we are adults. We should all know by now that nothing in life comes easy (especially not relationships with the opposite sex).

2. You make up.                                                        If you understand that you are both human and make mistakes (don’t get me wrong, there are certain mistakes that this rule doesn’t apply to) and can forgive each other; if you never go to bed angry with one another, and you both learn to compromise because suddenly, it’s not just your own happiness that matters anymore; what you’ve got is something worth holding on to. Making up is the best part about arguing, it’s an opportunity to remember just how much the other person means to you and value the fact that you’re both willing to accept each other’s craziness.

3. You are happy.                                                    Completely and utterly, 100% happy. When being in their presence gives you butterflies and looking into their eyes makes you smile; when doing nothing at all becomes more fun than going out every weekend; when the only time they make you cry is from laughing too hard and you really only get mad when they don’t share their food with you.. Know that what you have together is rare and it’s special. Cherish it.

4. You have no questions, no doubts, no worries.                                                                        You don’t wonder about where they are or what they’re doing, while other people are stalking their significant others’ social media pages to make sure they’re not up to no good. You don’t question when they will be home, because you trust them without a doubt. The two of you are capable of being away from each other, but at the end of the day, you’d much rather be together. When there are no questions because there are no secrets, it’s real. Trust is pertinent in a lasting relationship.

5. You just know.                                                     When they are the first person on your mind when you wake up and the last person you think about before you fall asleep; when it doesn’t matter what happens in life, they are the one you always want by your side and the first person you tell all of your secrets to; when they are your best friend, your partner, your confidant, don’t let go. 

The truth is, there’s always going to be obvious hints that can either make or break a relationship, but when you’ve finally got the right one, it’ll be hard to find all of the words to describe it, there will be no uncertainty. No argument could ever break the bond between the two of you and none of life’s obstacles will bring you down for too long, because your partner on this journey through life will be there helping you back up, every single step of the way. When you’ve got ‘the one’, you will feel it in your gut and know with every inch of your being, that they are your soulmate and your happily ever after.